


two of us in this world

by TheRPL



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Canon Compliant, Friends to Lovers, Friendship, M/M, Made For Each Other, Mentioned SuperM Ensemble, Mentioned WayV Ensemble, Mutual Pining, One Shot, Pining, SM management is trash in this story, Sassy Chittaphon Leechaiyapornkul | Ten, Soft Qian Kun, comforting ten, no beta we die like men, worried kun
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-23
Updated: 2020-10-23
Packaged: 2021-03-08 18:55:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,876
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27161470
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheRPL/pseuds/TheRPL
Summary: Maybe it started like this.One night Kunhang almost walked in on Kun, sitting at the dinner table in the dark, head in hands. He stopped in his track when he noticed Kun was not alone.Or maybe it started months before their debut when they were busy with rehearsals. Kun had asked Sicheng afterward whether he had also noticed Ten's discomfort as he tried to execute a particularly taxing sequence of movements.Or maybe it started sometime late at night in foreign countries when Ten was so tired with longing he was unable to sleep. Lucas would pretend not to hear the words he would whisper over the phone.Maybe it was a series of before and afters, a chain reaction, leading to the inevitable.
Relationships: Chittaphon Leechaiyapornkul | Ten/Qian Kun
Comments: 54
Kudos: 435
Collections: NCT_favourite





	two of us in this world

**Author's Note:**

> Title from SuperM 'Wish you were here'

Maybe it started like this.

One night Kunhang almost walked in on Kun, sitting at the dinner table in the dark, head in hands. He stopped in his track when he noticed Kun was not alone.

Or maybe it started months before their debut when they were still busy with dance rehearsals. Kun had asked Sicheng afterward whether he had also noticed Ten's discomfort as he tried to execute a particularly taxing sequence of movements.

Or maybe it started sometime late at night in foreign countries when Ten was so tired with longing he was unable to sleep. Lucas would pretend not to hear the words he would whisper over the phone.

Maybe it was a series of before and afters, a chain reaction, leading to the inevitable. 

Kun and Ten had a peculiar dynamic. All the members knew it. It had been there since before their debut, and it felt as if it predated them all. The boys had gotten used quickly to the bickering and frequent arguments between the two. Kun was the leader, and he had to look after the members. Some more than others. Indeed preventing Yangyang from turning the dorm into his own personal loft and/or war zone, depending on his mood, was a full-time job. It was second nature to Kun to look after them. If he cooked for himself, he would naturally cook for all of them. If he fetched himself a water bottle, he would bring a few with him to distribute to the others. He'd be the last to enter the car, the first one to greet the staff, and the last one to enter a room and close the door behind them. 

Ten was bubbly, and lively, and chaotic, and spoke in equal measure to communicate and get a reaction out of people. Kun was a little bit too centered, a little bit too strong and collected. He was witty too and had a unique talent to answer Ten in a way that only spurred him more, made him bolder, more outrageous. Kun was like a wall to Ten's antics, and Ten did not like running into walls. Not one bit.

"I said I wanted tteokbokki."

"And we agreed hours ago that we'd order pizza."

Sicheng raised his eyes from his phone just in time to see Ten frown. Sicheng had taken place in the seat in the corner of the living room. Ten had been on his way to his room, he assumed, when he stopped at the entrance of the living room once he spotted Kun there. It was the tone of absolute indifference answering Ten's vain pleas that seemed to rub him the wrong way.

'But I want tteokbokki!" Ten repeated, throwing himself dramatically next to Kun on their living room's couch. Kun did not acknowledge him one bit, clearly engrossed in the task of ordering their dinner.

"One cheese, one pepperoni, one extra meat. Anything else?" asked Kun loud enough to be heard by the other members who were getting changed and taking showers after a long day of practice. Distanced "yes!" and "you're the best, Kun-ma" answered him. "Good for me," answered Sicheng, not looking away from the two bickering men.

Ten faceplanted straight into a cushion. "Tteokbokki!" He screamed, thankfully muffled by the soft fabric.

"Don't put your mouth there. That's where we sit!" Kun tried to push him away gently by pressing on his shoulder. When Ten did not budge, he lowered his hand on Ten's head and pressed it with two fingers. "At least turn your head to get your mouth off it."

Ten complied, angling his body slightly on his side, raising sulky eyes and pouty lips in Kun's direction.

Kun barely glanced in his direction before laughing. "That's not gonna work."

"God. You have a heart made of ice," huffed Ten. "What will it take for you to take care of me?" he sighed dramatically.

Kun remained silent for a few minutes, absorbed by the order he was placing. Ten remained where he was and eventually closed his eyes, probably lulled by the sounds of the others speaking, the opening and closing of doors, Yangyang's overexcited screeching. Sicheng also returned to his phone, tapping away at his notifications, reading the messages from his friends and family he had ignored during the day.

"How's your knee?" The question was murmured, and Sicheng shifted his attention to where Kun had turned to Ten.

The latter opened his eyes slowly, almost lazily, not unlike a cat. "It's fine. I'm fine," replied Ten, but the answer was a bit too curt to be truthful. Ten was many things, but he was a notoriously bad liar for those who knew him. He had such talent for expressing himself, on stage and off. The downside was that he tended, when he was not careful, to be an open book.

"Ten…" sighed Kun.

"It's fine," repeated the other, a note of finality to his tone.

Sicheng saw Kun debate internally for a few seconds before speaking up again. "You know if you need more breaks or even a few changes to the choreo, we'd all be ready to accommodate tha-"

Ten did not let him finish his sentence that he got up from the couch.

"I think I'll go get changed before the pizza arrives," was all he said before he turned around and stalked out of the living room.

Kun stared at the place Ten had just stood for a while.

"You think his knee is acting up?" couldn't help but ask Sicheng. They were all very much aware of Ten's history of his knee injury. He remembered the surgery and ensuing physiotherapy. It was bad enough, he knew, that it even got Ten discharged from the Thai military draft. And yet, he was an idol and arguably their strongest dancer and was training relentlessly for WayV's debut.

"You didn't notice?" asked Kun.

Sicheng shook his head. "You did?"

"Yeah,…" answered Kun. "We have this bit in the choreo, you know, where we go down, and we flip our knees in, and I just…" he stopped himself. "I just could see it, you know? On his face. I could see he was pushing through the pain."

Many things went through Sicheng's thoughts. First, he was struck at how much Kun cared about them and their well being. Then, he was surprised at how fine-tuned he seemed to Ten, specifically. Sicheng thought about how he had decided to bring the topic up with Ten, despite knowing that the man would at least rebuke him out of principle, if not out of pride. Sicheng also thought about how much Kun must care if he decided to share it with him.

"You really care," was what he settled on to say. 

Kun observed him for a moment before visibly deflating. "I do, yeah."

"I think if it becomes too much, he'll tell," finally said Sicheng. "He's been good recovering from it so far. He's proud, but I don't think he'd let it hinder his health." He believed every word he told Kun and hoped his leader could feel it.

"Yeah. I think you're right. I guess I wish he'd just…" he left his thought unfinished.

"You wish that he'd just what?" prodded Sicheng, too intrigued not to know what Kun was going to say.

The man looked down at his lap, nervously tapping his fingers against his thigh. "I guess I wish he'd just let me help."

Sicheng saw the conflict written on Kun's face and had a feeling he knew what was going on inside Kun's heart better than the man himself. "There are things that cannot be helped," is the answer he settled on. He meant it in more ways than one.

"I guess you're right."

Soon, the boys started appearing in the living room, and it was Sicheng and Kun's turn to clean up, get dressed and settle in with the others. Pizza arrived, and Kun took it to the living room. He made Kunhang and Yangyang bring plates, glasses, and sodas for all. Sicheng had commandeered the remote and was currently choosing the film they would be watching together. Kun put the pizza boxes down on the living room table, keeping to himself a small plastic container. As the other boys rushed for the pizza, he plopped down beside Ten, who had not moved from his spot on the couch. Sicheng had finally settled on a film and was patiently waiting for the boys to finish fighting over pizza slices.

"Not eating?" he heard Kun ask behind him.

He turned around just in time to see Ten shake his head. His hair was still damp from having been washed, and his skin was shiny with his face cream.

"You sure?" asked Kun with a smirk. Before Ten could question him, he added, pointing to the container he was holding. "Well, I guess I'll have all this tteokbokki to myself, then."

"What?" The look of pure amazement that crossed Ten's face as he launched himself at the box was priceless. Sicheng assumed Kun believed so to when he saw the smile that split across his face.

Once they were all settled down, Kun and Ten on one couch, Lucas and Kunhang on the other, Yangyang and Dejun splayed on the carpet, and Sicheng on the seat in the corner, they dimmed the lights and started the movie. Halfway through the film, Sicheng saw Ten rearranged his legs from where he had folded them. He winced wordlessly and stretched them in front of him before crossing them again. He thought nobody else had noticed his discomfort, including Kun, who had not glanced away once from the television, until the eldest slowly extended a hand to settle it gently on Ten's knee. Sicheng saw him rub his thumb softly against Ten's kneecap, in a comforting motion. Sicheng was expecting Ten to brush his hand off but was left stunned when instead Ten reached out to gently squeeze Kun's hand with his own. They remained like that, holding hands, for the rest of the film.

It was only a few months after debut, and Lucas hadn't been able to walk off the stage by himself. Kunhang and Sicheng had needed to support him on the way to the dressing room.

Kunhang blamed many things for their current predicament. He blamed their packed schedules, the long exhausting hours of practice. Mostly, he blamed SuperM. One afternoon, Ten and Lucas had been dragged to a meeting with the upper management of SM Entertainment, and came back to the dorm with a new schedule.

They would be part of a supergroup of sort, with Mark and Taeyong, who Kunhang assumed were already barely sleeping as it were, and other senior idols like Taemin, Kai and Baekhyun. That meant that they had to start recording a new album and start practicing new routines. They would be expected to be a part of two groups at once. It doubled their workload and the pressure they were under.

Kunhang would be long in bed when he would hear Ten enter their room late at night, exhausted from long hours of practice. When he woke up in the morning, Ten's bed would already be empty. Despite the long schedules, on his rare hours of free time, Ten could be found next to Kun, bickering over what to eat, laughing at his jokes despite the exhaustion written on his face, or encouraging Yangyang's pranks against the leader.

One evening, Kun had come knocking. "Is Ten not back yet?" he had asked, face unreadable. Kunhang couldn't tell whether he was worried, disappointed, or disapproving.

"No, he is back between twelve and two, normally." Kun had frown before wishing him good night. A few hours later, just when Kunhang had started dozing off, he heard voices coming from the hallway.

"You're back late." That was Kun's voice.

"Don't I know it," replied another familiar voice. Ten sounded too tired to be truly biting. "What are you doing up?"

"Nothing. I was just..." Kunhang lost the rest of Kun's answer when the leader had lower his voice.

"Well, you should be sleeping." Ten sounded exhausted. Kunhang did not know whether from his long day or Kun.

"You too," came the short answer.

Kunhang heard Ten sigh from the other side of the door.

"How's your knee?"

"Can we do that another time?" There was no real fight in Ten's voice. Just pure tiredness.

"Yeah. Okay. Good night Ten."

"Good night."

It turned out that Kun had been worrying about the wrong person because Lucas was the one having a hard time. Just the week prior, Lucas had to catch himself once they finished a song not to collapse. Then, the following week, he had been photographed by fans slouched over a handrail, face hidden in his elbow. Then came the stage incident.

Kun had made sure that a doctor had checked Lucas before settling him in his room with strict orders rest. He had then spent a good half hour over the phone with their manager trying to arrange for an emergency physiotherapy session the following day. He even tried to get one showcase canceled but to no avail. They had all called in an early night, exhausted from the day's events. While Kun was on the phone, Ten had been the one ushering all the members to their rooms. He had finally joined Kunhang in their shared room, and both had dozed off early without a word exchanged.

Kunhang was roused from his sleep by the sound of the door to their room opening and closing. He opened his eyes and could see despite the dark that Ten's bed was empty. He probably got up to get himself a glass of water. Kunhang stretched his arms above his head before deciding to follow suit, silently making his way into the kitchen.

The soft light from the night's sky filtering from the kitchen's window illuminated a figure, sitting at the dining table, head buried in two hands. Kunhang instantly recognized Kun. Before he had the chance to step in and call out his name, he saw a second silhouette, crouched beside Kun, forehead leaning against Kun's shoulder.

"He'll be fine," Ten was whispering to Kun. 

Kunhang realized belatedly that Ten was rubbing a gentle hand across Kun's shoulders.

"There's nothing else you can do. You know that, right?"

The sweet murmurs made Kunhang feel like he was intruding on something private, but just as he thought he should go back to his room, Kun lifted his face from his hand. "I should have done something sooner."

Ten tried to shush him, but Kun continued. "We knew last week already that he was unwell. He could barely stand straight after the song. I should have asked for a change of schedule right there and then. I should have…"

Ten lifted his forehead from Kun's shoulder and pressed his cheek to it instead to be able to meet the leader's eyes. Then Ten slowly brought the hand that had been rubbing Kun's back to his neck and started playing with the hair that was there at the nape.

"It's not your fault, Kun."

"But I'm the leader…" started to argue Kun.

"Kunnie." The tone with which Ten said his name seemed to drain the fight out of Kun.

"Tennie," he murmured back.

"He'll be fine. We'll be fine. It's overwhelming right now, but we'll get used to it…"

"You shouldn't have to." Despite the conversation being whispered, Kunhang heard the hurt in Kun's voice. "You shouldn't have to kill yourself over this… this… supergroup..."

Ten circled both arms around Kun's shoulders and squeezed him tight.

"It'll get better. I promise."

Ten released his hold and resumed his ministrations, eyes not leaving Kun's face. When Kun finally gazed back, he looked his age, young and vulnerable.

"What if something happens to you?" he asked, voice infinitely soft. "What if you get injured? What will I do then?"

At that moment, Kunhang understood several things at once. He understood why Ten insisted not to worry Kun with his schedule, why he lied by saying that he was fine. Ten was trying to prevent him from worrying too much. He realized that despite their bickering, Kun and Ten had always looked after each other. Hell, Ten was probably the only member to look after Kun. If Kun was the pillar to WayV, Ten was Kun's pillar.

Kunhang also understood that whatever existed between them exceeded him entirely.

"I'm not going anywhere," was all Ten said before he got up. "Come here, you look like you need a hug," he added before pulling Kun towards him. The leader shifted on his seat and wrapped his arms around Ten's waist, burying his face in the younger tummy, while Ten settled his hands delicately around Kun's broad shoulder. That is where Kunhang left them, holding each other in the privacy of the dark kitchen. He fell asleep before Ten came back to their room.

"Oh! Look at our handsome leader!" came a teasing voice on the right side of the photographer.

Dejun tried not to laugh when he saw Kun get flustered. He turned to Ten instead. "Stop that. You'll ruin the photoshoot."

The boys were taking new promotional photos. They had already spent most of the day taking cute group photos. The stylist had put Kun in a checkered shirt with round glasses, and Ten had spent the morning making jokes about his high school looks. They had had a break to eat and get changed before they continued the shoot, this time with a sexier, more provocative concept. Ten was of course shirtless, as stylists liked him, but with a buttoned jacket that proved to do a decent job at covering him. Dejun himself was sporting a white shirt with an indecently plunging V neck. He thought he looked good. All the others were wearing different outfits, with rolled-up sleeves, leather jackets, and carefully unbuttoned shirts. However, to everyone's surprise, it was Kun's outfit that happened to stand out. He was completely shirtless underneath an opened white jacket with matching white trousers. The fit was perfect. His disheveled black hair and carefully smudged makeup were perfect. He looked phenomenal.

All of them had wolf-whistled at him when he got out of the changing room, clapping loudly and sending lewd winks in his direction. Even Ten had made a comment or two, seemingly pleased with Kun's reactions to his teasing.

The process might have looked fun for outsiders, but photoshoots were in fact extremely long and tedious. They were starting with individuals shots before moving towards group photos. The boys had initially retreated to the side to avoid being in the way of the photographer and staff. This was true until it was Kun's turn to take his photos, and Dejun had noticed that Ten had wandered close to the shoot to observe. It didn't take long before the young man had all but settled in the periphery of the set, teasing Kun on his poses and generally entertaining the staff. Dejun joined him.

"Oh! Look at our handsome leader!" said Ten, eyes not leaving Kun as the leader was eyeing the camera, a seductive look in his eyes.

Dejun tried not to laugh when he saw Kun get flustered. He turned to Ten instead. "Stop that. You'll ruin the photoshoot."

"It's okay," chimed in the photographer. "You've given me plenty of nice shots of Kun, Ten," he added with a smile.

"Is that so?"

"Yes. Look, just now. Stay right there, Kun."

The eldest had turned to Ten to give him a pointed look but suddenly found himself having to hold the pose as the photographer got closer to him.

"That look you gave him, there was an edge to it. Can you do that again?" asked the photographer.

Kun nodded before focusing back again on Ten. Dejun turned to see that Ten had not looked away either, gaze focused on Kun only. Kun gave him a similar pointed look to the one he had just given him a minute ago. That made Ten raised his eyebrows. He seemed to want to get the better out of Kun. He purposefully raised his hand to the jacket's collar and slowly let his hand slide along the lapel. Kun's eyes shifted to take in the movement before he raised them again, sending him a look sharper than ever. Ten looked entranced by Kun. The latter seemed to be aware of that fact as he let his gaze rake over Ten's figure.

"Excellent! I think we're good," exclaimed the photographer, seemingly oblivious to the tension between the two men.

Dejun certainly was not oblivious. He was fascinated. He had noticed the teasing between his two members, but never that type of tension. When it came to Ten's turn to take his photos, Kun had not strayed far from him. He told Dejun that he wanted to give him just as hard a time, but Dejun knew not to fall for such a blatant lie. He could see them both magnetised by each other in the way their gaze never quite left him. The group shots came quickly, although by then, the shoot had extended into the night. The photographer had directed them, told them where to stand, how to hold themselves. When he told Kun to stand behind Ten and throw an arm around his shoulder, Dejun saw how quickly both men complied and how they appeared to lean on each other and mold each other's figure. If anyone else noticed, they didn't mention it.

Yangyang was just back from eating lunch out with Lucas and Dejun. He couldn't lie to himself and say he wouldn't miss his fellow members once they were gone promoting overseas for SuperM. This was their last day before their scheduled departure very early the following morning. All the boys had decided to spend it lazing around and going out for coffee or lunch outings. Kun had insisted that Lucas pack before leaving for lunch and had hovered over his shoulder until he was satisfied with the results. There was nothing planned for the rest of the afternoon until dinner time, where they would order in and watch a movie together. Yangyang was looking forward to lounge around on his bed, maybe play games on his phone, and do absolutely nothing until his presence was required.

He trotted to his room, a bounce in his step, but stopped short of barging in when he heard voices coming in from behind the half-closed door.

"You'll update me on the kids, right?" asked a slightly nasal voice that Yangyang recognized immediately to be Ten's.

"Are you sure you want that?" replied Kun with a laugh. "I think you'll be busy enough without having to deal with the group's antics."

Ten kept silent for a while. "Yeah, you're probably right. But I don't wanna miss anything, you know?" There was a vulnerability in his voice that made Yangyang creep closer to the door. Ten was sitting cross-legged on Kun's bed, gazing down his lap, just centimeters away from the other man who was watching him closely.

"You won't miss anything. You'll be the one making new memories. You'll become best friends with all your new cool hyungs. We should be the ones asking you and Lucas for constant updates."

"We'll be working. It's different."

"Is it? You'll be in the US, doing interviews for TV shows, and performing big stages on television…"

"It won't be the same," insists Ten, raising his head to look at Kun. "You know that, right? It won't be the same."

Yangyang had a feeling that Ten was talking about something else entirely.

"It won't?" repeated Kun, a softness in his voice.

"No. Of course not."

Yangyang could see Ten and Kun look at each other in silence for a few seconds.

"You know," started Kun, eyes still boring into Ten's, "sometimes I'm scared that you're gonna be happier there, with them."

Ten gasped loudly as if Kun had personally insulted him. It made the other man laugh. "You what? How dare you!" He reached over to push Kun's shoulder playfully, but Kun could catch his hand and hold it up to his chest.

"But really, see it from my perspective. You are in a supergroup, with tons of fans already, and with the most popular idols in the whole industry. How can we compete with that? I'm no Kai from EXO. I'm no Taemin from SHINee." As he was speaking, he intertwined one of his hands with Ten's.

"You idiot," came Ten's answer.

Kun looked stunned. "What? I'm not wrong…"

"You absolute idiot," continued Ten. "What complete and utter nonsense…" Kun looked devastated as Ten disentangled their hands but his expression slowly morphed into one of utter confusion as Ten wiggled over to him, snaked his arms around Kun's waist, and buried his face in his collarbone. "Compete with SuperM…" continued Ten, voice muffled by Kun's shirt.

It didn't take long for Kun to hug Ten to him as the younger of the two men continued his soft rambling. "How are you even the leader of this group..." continued Ten to Kun's laughters. When he was finished, Ten just stayed there, breathing quietly. "It's awful, Kun," finally said Ten, turning his head slightly to make sure he could be heard. "Not the boys, not the songs. That's fine. But the whole scheme. The management," Ten said, suddenly looking exhausted. "You know how they made a different version of the album for each one of the members?" It seemed that Ten waited until he could feel Kun nod. "Well, they want to know who's the most popular so that that person can get more lines and more center time in the future."

"What?" came Kun's slightly horrified response.

"We all know it, and it's awful. We've talked about it together, and we decided we would refuse to et these… these ploys come between us. But the whole thing is so messed up…" Ten's voice broke on the last word, and Yangyang saw Kun hold him just a little bit closer, a little bit tighter.

"I'll order a hundred of your albums," Kun announced to the room. "Nah, I'll order a thousand of them."

Ten's scrunched his face before bursting into laughter. "You're an idiot."

"I'll order them all. You'll be the SuperM member with the best sales."

Ten buried his face against Kun's throat, trying to suppress his giggling. "Thanks, I appreciate it," he managed to say, once his laughter subsided.

"It'll be fun. And it'll get better, I'm sure of it," whispered Kun, only for Ten to hear.

Ten, and Yangyang, as the maknae had remained by the door, observing the exchanges between his two hyungs. He looked behind him, reassured by the fact that no one else had wandered into the hallway this whole time. The entire dorm was eerily quiet. Everybody must be resting. Yangyang turned again to see that Ten had crept closer to Kun, arms still encircling his waist. Kun had now raised a hand to Ten's hair and was stroking it gently as Ten continued to rest his face in the crook of the leader's neck.

Yangyang decided to retreat to the living room. When Ten and Kun emerged later, he couldn't help but notice that they both remained within arm's reach of each other, a hand always placed carefully on the small of a back, an arm, or a shoulder. When they settled to eat and watch a film, Yangyang couldn't help but notice Kun's hand slipping underneath the hem of Ten's t-shirt, stroking the skin of his hip with his thumb.

When Lucas and Ten left in the early morning, Yangyang registered how tightly Ten hugged Kun, how he let his head fall on Kun's shoulder for a second too long before stepping back and leaving, luggage in tow.

Three days since they arrived in LA, none of the SuperM members had entirely recovered from the jet lag. They had spent three hectic days filming, doing photoshoots, appearing on television shows and events. Despite the long hours, it always took Lucas a few hours to fall asleep at night. Often, he fell asleep to the image of Ten, his roommate, face lit up by his phone in the dark of the room.

While Lucas didn't know for certain who Ten was texting every night, he had an inkling. He was proven right on that third night.

Lucas was lying down in his bed in the dark, completely immobile. His breathing was shallow. He felt himself dozing off when he heard Ten shuffle in his sheets.

He half-opened his eyes to see that his roommate had turned around, back facing him. He could still see the glow of his phone illuminating his profile.

Something buzzed. 

"Hey…" he heard Ten whisper.

Despite his tiredness, Lucas tried to tune in to Ten's voice.

"Yeah, I'm rooming with Lucas, and he's asleep. You know just how much of a heavy sleeper he is."

'Ah. There,' thought Lucas. That just about confirmed who he thought was on the other side of the call.

"How are things? How are the members?" asked Ten, a little bit uncertain, as if he didn't know what to ask.

Then came a short, almost silent sort of laugh. "What a brat. Poor Kunnie. How do you even manage without me?" came Ten's teasing response to whatever Kun had said to him.

Lucas didn't know what Kun answered, but he heard Ten gasp. He opened his eyes to see Ten, still with his back to him, but shoulders clearly tensed. "You shouldn't say things like that," came Ten's voice, fragile, as if on the verge of breaking. "You're not allowed to say things like that, not when you're so far away from me."

Lucas squeezed his eyes shut tight, wishing it could also somehow turn his ears off. Whatever they talked about was clearly between the two of them, and he did not feel like he had the right to hear.

Kun's reply must have defused the tension because Lucas could hear Ten hum. "Well, I'm still jet-lagged. But I'm okay, I guess. So is Lucas. He's doing great. You would be proud of him."

Lucas tried his best to suppress a smile. How cute was their leader, keeping an eye out for him even when he was in a different group?

"Yes, mom. I am eating well." It took everything in Lucas not to laugh at the exasperation in Ten's voice. "It's okay. My knee is okay." This answer was said with slightly less annoyance.

"Do you miss me?" Lucas had not expected Ten to ask this question, and he had not been ready for it, certainly not with the tone of fragility it was asked with. He cracked an eye open to see Ten sag in the mattress, ear pressed to the phone. "Because I miss you," Ten said. A few seconds passed, where Lucas could see Ten settle ever close to the phone as if he could bury himself in it, or in the voice that came from it. "You're such a dork," he said next. "I miss you." Lucas was still not used to hearing Ten say this, not with this affectionate voice, not with so much fondness. "Well, get used to it. I miss you."

Lucas could imagine the state these words could put Kun in, but he opted not to. Sleep was slowly taking over, and he fell asleep to Ten's whispers.

Over the following three weeks, the phone calls became a recurring occurrence. Lucas had to get comfortable with Ten chatting softly about their day's activities, recounting Baekhyun's pranks, or all the funny or embarrassing moments like the time Lucas had almost slipped on stage. He had to get used to hearing "I miss you" or "I wish you were here" whispered occasionally throughout their conversations, although those moments always sounded too private for him to witness. Towards the end of their time in the US, Ten had started counting down the days. "Just a few days now" and "I'm almost back" were repeated like mantras.

They both slept like logs on their flights back. When they arrived at the dorm, they were welcomed by the overexcited members who hugged them tightly and shouted their 'welcome backs.' Yangyang had yelled 'Cause when we jumping and popping we jopping' along with a poorly rendered choreo, while Lucas had swept both Kunhang and Dejun into bear hugs. Sicheng was laughing loudly at the scene. Ten saw Kun hanging in the back and ignored the chaos to make his way to him. Without a word, he threw his arms around his neck and let Kun bring him in the warmest embrace. They stayed like that for a while, as the boys finally calmed down, and Lucas unceremoniously pushed Ten away, claiming it was his time to get a welcome hug from their leader. Kun obliged with a grin. Everything felt normal.

Later that night, Lucas had gone to get a snack from the kitchen when he saw Yangyang get out of his room, pillow, and blanket in hand.

"What are you doing?"

"Going to sleep on the couch," answered the youngest without another glance in Lucas' direction. Kunhang stepped out of his room, calling out to Yangyang. "Don't be an idiot. Come sleep here." The maknae dragged himself to the room and shut the door behind him.

'What on earth is going on?' asked himself Lucas, continuing on his way to the kitchen. He stopped dead in his track when he saw Sicheng and Dejun lingering around the entrance, both trying to steal glances at what was going on inside without being seen.

"What are you guys doing?" whispered Lucas, who was promptly shushed by both men and shoved behind them.

Lucas tapped on Sicheng's shoulder, silently asking for an explanation, which Sicheng provided by pointing a finger in the direction of the kitchen.

It took him a few seconds for his eyes to adjust to the dark, but once they did, Lucas could unmistakably recognize two silhouettes embracing tightly. Kun, Lucas identified, was holding Ten closely to him, hands wandering across the smaller man's back. They were standing forehead to forehead, just standing there in an intimate grasp. Sicheng waved his hand at Lucas, indicating in no uncertain terms that the two had been kissing. Lucas' mouth dropped open in shock, but just as he redirected his gaze at the two men in the kitchen, Ten was tilting his head to press his lips against Kun's. They both swayed on the spot as Kun tried to bring Ten even closer, and Ten answered in kind by pressing into the kiss. They both remained like this, lips locking over and over again unti Lucas finally shook himself from his trance.

"I'll go," he tried to indicate silently to the two others, who simply waved him off. 'Indeed,' thought Lucas, 'his two hyungs acting as if they were the only two persons in the world.' Everything was normal.

**Author's Note:**

> First fic! let me know what you think :)


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